STICK-TO-ITIVE-NESS

WHY CAN'T KIDS FINISH WHAT THEY START?

Have you ever noticed some kids jump from one activity to another without spending concentrated time on any one thing or just never seeming to finish anything? Adults may see this as a sign the child can’t stay focused, gets bored easily, or gives up without the resilience to keep trying. 

But for little ones, it may simply be a matter of physical endurance. For instance, drawing a picture takes concentrated hand strength. When their hand gets tired, it doesn’t feel good. So they switch to another activity that uses a different set of muscles giving their hand a chance to rest.

It’s actually a clever strategy if you think about it. But learning to finish what you start is an important readiness skill (and mind-set) for school and life.

GET OUTSIDE & PLAY

If you've noticed this tendency, watch to see if they’re using different muscle groups when they jump from one activity to another. If they are, consider introducing more time outdoors and on the playground. All whole-body active play will naturally build up stamina and endurance across all the muscle groups which, over time, will give them the power they need to stick with it!

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KIDS THAT GO BUMP

We’re guessing every parent knows this kid. The one who goes bump into everything... the furniture... the potted plant... the ever-patient pet... and especially you. They’ll practically knock you over if you’re not looking! 

We call those “bump ‘n hugs” and in our view, they’re the best part of the day. 

But did you ever wonder why they do it?

WHY KIDS GO BUMP

The technical term for it is proprioception - our internal GPS system. You see, children aren’t born with an understanding of their own bodies. They don’t even know their own size or shape at first. They learn it over time through interactions with the people, places, spaces, and things in their path.

But it’s not as simple as introducing your child to the ottoman and they’re good to go. Their body is always growing which means their spatial relationships are constantly changing. And that’s why they go bump. As we describe it in A Moving Child is a Learning Child...

“It’s not a question adults have to think about. But it’s a big idea for little ones. Will I fit? And that likely explains why kids love to climb in, on, around, under, over, and through things. It’s their way of exploring their place in our world.”

HOW YOU CAN HELP

Sit back and watch and you’ll see your child is working on this all the time. Notice how they might take an indirect route to get where they’re going, preferring to go under the coffee table for example, or over the arm of a chair.

Consider what you have right in your own living room they could navigate. For instance, throw pillows on the floor that challenge them to move over or around them. Put different sized cardboard boxes around so they can see how they fit into them. Use the dining room set as a natural tunneling system. Position the ottoman to block their path so they have to retrace their steps. (But don't be surprised if they decide it's a mountain to climb!) Or choose a row of tiles on the floor or a crack in the sidewalk to walk along. 

Encourage them to move in space-related ways. For instance, bring your head down when crawling under things. Move sideways in tight spaces. Bend your knees to jump over things. 

And most important of all, the next time you get a bump ‘n hug, be sure to hug back extra tight so they know you are where they always fit.

PLAY MAKES THE BEST TEACHER

We wrote a blog post called Parents Make the Best Playmates several years ago and it has always been one of our most popular topics. (You'll see the post in full below.) In these days when parents are being called upon to guide their children's learning at home, it's important to understand in the early years, play is the most powerful learning tool of all.

We'll dig deeper into the power of play over the next few weeks, but for now, rest assured. You don't need a degree in education. All you need to do is relax and play. Because even if you don't recognize it in the moment, your child is learning in so many ways...

Play is TANGIBLE and PHYSICAL. Kids are tangible, physical creatures. That's why they can't sit still.

Play is a WHOLE-CHILD EXPERIENCE, inviting the body, senses, emotions, imagination, and natural problem solving to the party. That's why she becomes so engrossed she doesn't even hear you calling to her.

PLAY BEGINS WITH THE CHILD, making the entire experience personal and relevant. That's why she puts on her tiara and goes out to the garden to make mud pies. It makes sense to her.

Play is how children learn to RELATE TO OTHERS. That's why it's important to make time for the two of you to play together each day.

Which brings us to today's topic. As important as play is, we've found some parents don't fully understand their role in the process. Take a look at our original blog post for a few ways you can become a better playmate to your child and have fun along the way...

PARENTS MAKE THE BEST PLAYMATES

All child development experts (including me) will tell you that one of the best things you can do for your child is to play with your child. But those same experts (including me) often lament that parents don’t always know HOW to play with their kids.

I have a theory about this. Adults sometimes struggle with “child’s play” because it is counter-intuitive to what’s expected of us in every other part of our lives. As adults, we’re expected to be strong, mature and in control at all times; responsible, efficient, effective, and results-oriented. Yet it is these exact qualities that make adults INEFFECTIVE as play partners to their children.  

To help you understand what I mean, here are a few rules of thumb I prescribe for parents during playtime...

FOLLOW, DON’T LEAD. When it comes to play, your child is better at it than you are.  Know your place and follow her lead (unless safety becomes an issue).

GET SHORTER. Whenever you can, bring yourself down to her level (both physically and emotionally). This is your time to see the world through her eyes.

KEEP IT POINTLESS. True play has no agenda – no rightness or wrongness to it. Whatever happens happens. Keeping playtime open and free is not only the best way to encourage your child's imagination, it's also the best way to help her learn naturally.

And no matter what, remember, playtime is for both of you, so relax and go for the ride!

THE OVER-UNDER JOURNEY!     

Playing collaborative games equalizes the playing field for your child while giving you a perfect, kids-eye-view of life!  Next time you have a few minutes, try taking an Over-Under Journey and you might just be amazed where the two of you end up!

SET UP

1. Start by deciding where to go.  You may want to go to a real place like the kitchen or you could think of grander, imaginative places like the Dinosaur Forest or the Princess Castle!  (Wherever you decide to go, pick a physical location 10-15 feet away as your target for a game of 5-6 turns.)  Let your child decide the destination and then follow her imaginative lead.

2. Next, decide who is "Over" and who is "Under."  Again, let your child decide.  

3. Using only your bodies and your imaginations, the "Over" player must travel each step of the journey by going over the other player.  Likewise, the  "Under" player must go under the other player.

GAME PLAY

Here’s a few ideas to get you started.  Note:  These ideas are written for parents but can easily be adjusted for children as well.  But be sure to let your children make up their own over/under obstacles as much as possible.

• Go OVER THE HILL (stand tall and let your child climb all the way up you!)
• Go UNDER THE BRIDGE (form a bridge with your body or legs and let your child climb under)
• Go OVER THE TICKLE TIGER (lie down on your back and have your child climb over your tummy -- tickling as she goes!)
• GO UNDER GATE (lie on the floor and raise one leg in the air up and down.  Have your child scoot through the gate.)
• Go OVER THE TEA POT (sit on the floor and form the shape of a tea pot.  As your child climbs over you, whistle like a tea pot!
• Go UNDER THE PUDDLE (lie down on the floor tummy-side down.  Have your child "swim" underneath you)
• GO OVER THE WORM (wiggle like a worm on the floor and have your child climb over you from head to toe)
• GO UNDER THE TUNNEL.  (sit on the floor with your knees up and have your child climb through)

Have fun, and let me know how your journey went!

A KINETIC CHRISTMAS: Tinsel Toes

Day 19

Tinsel Toes

FROM LEAPING TO SKIPPING (4+)

Click to Enlarge

SANTA'S TAKE-OFF

On Christmas Eve, while every one's busy in the Workshop getting Santa ready to take off, there's one elf outside getting the take-off ready.

His name is Tinsel Toes and he's in charge of the tinsel that lines the runway. It's a really long runway, and every flutter of tinsel has to be perfectly straight so the sleigh sets off in the right direction!

Now, this is a big job, but don't you worry. Tinsel Toes has been doing it for as long as anyone can remember. He's bound to get it right one of these years.

(OK. So if you really want to know the truth, the runway is always crooked as a candy cane. But don't blame Tinsel Toes. It's not his fault. It's the tinsel! You see, it's a little known fact that when you step on tinsel, it tickles your toes and makes you dance! And when you dance, it's hard to keep things straight!)

Maybe you'll have better luck. Would you like to help Tinsel Toes lay out Santa's runway? But just beware. Your toes might start dancing!

TINSEL TOES

Back on Day 1 of our Kinetic Christmas series, we talked about the sensory value of tinsel. So let's take that a step further…. do these games BAREFOOT...

TINSEL BEAM. Lay out a single path of tinsel and walk on it all the way to the end. Now, walk backwards on the tinsel back to where you started. (Remember to try to keep your runway straight!)

TINSEL RUNWAY. Lay out two strands of tinsel parallel to each other about 6" apart. Step carefully BETWEEN the tinsel. If your toes touch the tinsel, stop, lay down, put your feet in the air and twinkle your toes!

TINSEL TWIZZLE. Lay out two strands of tinsel parallel to each other about 12" apart. Cross-walk along the tinsel, putting your right foot on the left tinsel, your left foot on the right tinsel. (Some children may need assistance with this. It's an advanced midline activity, so stand by just in case.)

TINSEL TROUBLE. How many ways can you dance on the tinsel? For instance, try walking the length of the tinsel on your tippy toes... your heels... the sides of your feet. How would a caterpillar dance on tinsel? A monkey? A penguin?

DO THE TINSEL TIZZY! Put on some upbeat music and dance, but here's the trick. All throughout the dance, you must have at least one foot on the tinsel! (It may help to pretend to "glue" his foot to the tinsel. Rub his foot with your hand, then "stick it" to the tinsel. This gives him a physical cue to remember to keep his foot still.) Make up some dance steps for your child to try, then have him make up his own. And don't forget to Do the Tinsel Tizzy with him! After all, toes are for dancing!

Wishing you a happy, healthy, and active holiday season!

A KINETIC CHRISTMAS

BLOG SERIES

24 DAYS OF ACTIVE HOLIDAY PLAY!

DAY 1: A KINETIC CHRISTMAS

DAY 2: CANDY-CANE-GO-ROUND

DAY 3: BE THE TREE 

DAY 4: REINDEER REINS 

DAY 5: CHRISTMAS CRAWL

DAY 6: ROCKIN' AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE

DAY 7: WALRUS WORDS

DAY 8: CHIMNEY TRICKS!

DAY 9: CANDY CANE HOCKEY

DAY 10: JINGLE RINGS

DAY 11: THREE HEADED GINGERBREAD MONSTER

DAY 12: SANTA SAYS! 

DAY 13: SANTA CLAUS WAY

DAY 14: INDOOR SNOW!

DAY 15: MAKE YOUR OWN BLIZZARD

DAY 16: FROSTY STACKS

DAY 17: REINDEER RELAY

DAY 18: LITTLE DRUMMER KIDS

DAY 19: TINSEL TOES

DAY 20: JINGLE TAG 

DAY 21: NUTCRACKER JIG

DAY 22: SANTA'S SACK

DAY 23: PASS THE PRESENTS

DAY 24: MAKING MAGIC

WHEN THE SCORE DOESN'T MATTER

Today there are so many wonderful programs to introduce young children to the idea of individual and organized sports. From itty bitty soccer teams to gymnastics, swimming, tennis, and so much more, children are being exposed to sports and sport techniques at a very young age. And in my view, that's all great so long as three things are firmly in place...

1. Your child is having FUN at whatever he's doing
2. Your child is getting a VARIETY of physical experiences along the way
3. Any notion of judgment or competition... winning/losing, succeeding/failing... is kept OFF the playing field 

THE FUN IMPERATIVE
Now, the good news is most of the programs I know recognize, honor, respect what I call "the fun imperative" for little ones. Put simply these programs put the emphasis where it needs to be... on participation, exploration, experimentation, effort, and joy.

However, from time to time I run into a grown-up who seems to have something else in mind (or simply forgets what fun looks like).

For instance, a while back I was with my granddaughter at her "'nastics" class. At three, she is bright, loving, smart as a whip, and one of the most uncoordinated little kids I've ever known. (And that's saying something given my line of work.) In fact, I'm here to tell you, it's quite likely she is the worst 'nast in her 'nastics class. And she LOVES every minute of it!

Anyway, as I was sitting and watching her bumble off the 3" balance beam four times in five steps, I overheard a mom nearby telling a friend that she wasn't going to sign her son up for another term. "He's not very good at this," she admitted.

I looked across the gym and spotted her little boy who was, as described, not much better than my granddaughter in technique or coordination. But the look of determination on his little face spoke volumes to how much he was enjoying what he was trying to do. Sure, by adult standards, he stunk. But then you've got to ask yourself, who needs standards when you're that little and trying that hard.

(Besides, who needs the lessons more... the kid who's good at it, or the kid who stinks?)

VARIETY MATTERS
Sometimes a child enjoys a sport so much, it's all he wants to do. And while I respect and encourage that kind of enthusiasm, it’s also important for his overall development to provide a variety of different physical experiences. In fact, research has shown that children with a well-rounded background in physical movement and play are BETTER PREPARED to specialize in a sport later on.

And then there's the burn-out factor. Young children who push themselves (or are pushed) into competitive sports too early may well be the ones who burn out early too. 

THE COMPETITION NO-NO
Now, it's funny to talk about the ills of competition and sports in the same sentence, but for little ones, being measured or compared on their physical performance can have lasting, negative effects. Beyond demoralizing your child with a premature concept of failure, or pinching his pride a little, introducing competition too early (especially physical competition) might serve to inhibit what NEEDS to be the free and freeing use of his body for his overall development.

And I’m not just talking about his physical development. You see, little ones are TANGIBLE LEARNERS. Any dent in his confidence to use his body in ways that feel natural to him may impact his view of his abilities in other areas as well, including how he approaches learning.


So, if you are considering a sports program for your "pre-athlete" remember... keep it fun, mix it up, and leave the competition OFF the field.