STICK-TO-ITIVE-NESS

WHY CAN'T KIDS FINISH WHAT THEY START?

Have you ever noticed some kids jump from one activity to another without spending concentrated time on any one thing or just never seeming to finish anything? Adults may see this as a sign the child can’t stay focused, gets bored easily, or gives up without the resilience to keep trying. 

But for little ones, it may simply be a matter of physical endurance. For instance, drawing a picture takes concentrated hand strength. When their hand gets tired, it doesn’t feel good. So they switch to another activity that uses a different set of muscles giving their hand a chance to rest.

It’s actually a clever strategy if you think about it. But learning to finish what you start is an important readiness skill (and mind-set) for school and life.

GET OUTSIDE & PLAY

If you've noticed this tendency, watch to see if they’re using different muscle groups when they jump from one activity to another. If they are, consider introducing more time outdoors and on the playground. All whole-body active play will naturally build up stamina and endurance across all the muscle groups which, over time, will give them the power they need to stick with it!

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PLAY MAKES THE BEST TEACHER

We wrote a blog post called Parents Make the Best Playmates several years ago and it has always been one of our most popular topics. (You'll see the post in full below.) In these days when parents are being called upon to guide their children's learning at home, it's important to understand in the early years, play is the most powerful learning tool of all.

We'll dig deeper into the power of play over the next few weeks, but for now, rest assured. You don't need a degree in education. All you need to do is relax and play. Because even if you don't recognize it in the moment, your child is learning in so many ways...

Play is TANGIBLE and PHYSICAL. Kids are tangible, physical creatures. That's why they can't sit still.

Play is a WHOLE-CHILD EXPERIENCE, inviting the body, senses, emotions, imagination, and natural problem solving to the party. That's why she becomes so engrossed she doesn't even hear you calling to her.

PLAY BEGINS WITH THE CHILD, making the entire experience personal and relevant. That's why she puts on her tiara and goes out to the garden to make mud pies. It makes sense to her.

Play is how children learn to RELATE TO OTHERS. That's why it's important to make time for the two of you to play together each day.

Which brings us to today's topic. As important as play is, we've found some parents don't fully understand their role in the process. Take a look at our original blog post for a few ways you can become a better playmate to your child and have fun along the way...

PARENTS MAKE THE BEST PLAYMATES

All child development experts (including me) will tell you that one of the best things you can do for your child is to play with your child. But those same experts (including me) often lament that parents don’t always know HOW to play with their kids.

I have a theory about this. Adults sometimes struggle with “child’s play” because it is counter-intuitive to what’s expected of us in every other part of our lives. As adults, we’re expected to be strong, mature and in control at all times; responsible, efficient, effective, and results-oriented. Yet it is these exact qualities that make adults INEFFECTIVE as play partners to their children.  

To help you understand what I mean, here are a few rules of thumb I prescribe for parents during playtime...

FOLLOW, DON’T LEAD. When it comes to play, your child is better at it than you are.  Know your place and follow her lead (unless safety becomes an issue).

GET SHORTER. Whenever you can, bring yourself down to her level (both physically and emotionally). This is your time to see the world through her eyes.

KEEP IT POINTLESS. True play has no agenda – no rightness or wrongness to it. Whatever happens happens. Keeping playtime open and free is not only the best way to encourage your child's imagination, it's also the best way to help her learn naturally.

And no matter what, remember, playtime is for both of you, so relax and go for the ride!

THE OVER-UNDER JOURNEY!     

Playing collaborative games equalizes the playing field for your child while giving you a perfect, kids-eye-view of life!  Next time you have a few minutes, try taking an Over-Under Journey and you might just be amazed where the two of you end up!

SET UP

1. Start by deciding where to go.  You may want to go to a real place like the kitchen or you could think of grander, imaginative places like the Dinosaur Forest or the Princess Castle!  (Wherever you decide to go, pick a physical location 10-15 feet away as your target for a game of 5-6 turns.)  Let your child decide the destination and then follow her imaginative lead.

2. Next, decide who is "Over" and who is "Under."  Again, let your child decide.  

3. Using only your bodies and your imaginations, the "Over" player must travel each step of the journey by going over the other player.  Likewise, the  "Under" player must go under the other player.

GAME PLAY

Here’s a few ideas to get you started.  Note:  These ideas are written for parents but can easily be adjusted for children as well.  But be sure to let your children make up their own over/under obstacles as much as possible.

• Go OVER THE HILL (stand tall and let your child climb all the way up you!)
• Go UNDER THE BRIDGE (form a bridge with your body or legs and let your child climb under)
• Go OVER THE TICKLE TIGER (lie down on your back and have your child climb over your tummy -- tickling as she goes!)
• GO UNDER GATE (lie on the floor and raise one leg in the air up and down.  Have your child scoot through the gate.)
• Go OVER THE TEA POT (sit on the floor and form the shape of a tea pot.  As your child climbs over you, whistle like a tea pot!
• Go UNDER THE PUDDLE (lie down on the floor tummy-side down.  Have your child "swim" underneath you)
• GO OVER THE WORM (wiggle like a worm on the floor and have your child climb over you from head to toe)
• GO UNDER THE TUNNEL.  (sit on the floor with your knees up and have your child climb through)

Have fun, and let me know how your journey went!

HOW SLOW CAN YOU GO?

Lucky me! The other day I had a "Charlie Day" with my grandson (whose name is Jakie not Charlie, but that’s a story for another day). Charlie Days consist of a sleepover followed by a full day of fun for just the two of us. No mommies, daddies, or big sisters allowed!

Jakie is a loving, gentle child with the typical tornadic energy you would expect from a three-going-on-four year old boy. That means Charlie Days are why-walk-when-we-can-run days! 

Fun, but phew!

And that got me thinking about the importance of speed in a young child’s life.

Why Kids Love Fast!

It seems that just minutes after their first steps, little ones are off and running. Not walking. Running! I love that stage, watching them relish the freedom of their own two feet.

And certainly, going fast feels good and is a large part of why “fast” is a young child’s default speed. But it’s not the only reason.

You see “fast” is actually easier than “slow” for young children. That’s because when the human body moves fast, the physics of forward momentum take over part of the job our sense of balance normally does for us. When we move slow, we rely more on our balance to keep us steady, stable, and upright. And that’s where the challenge comes in for little ones.

As we’ve written about before, children aren’t born with a sense of balance. Balance is developed in the early years through the natural process of movement. As such, when children do get to their feet, the brain and body are working double-time, managing balance and complex movements simultaneously. And of course, that takes some getting used to… actually years of getting used to in order to perfect the highly sophisticated act of moving at a slow, controlled pace!

Why Slow Matters

Now, going fast is perfectly natural and great for kids. But it’s important to try to slow them down too... at least sometimes. You see, going fast doesn’t give the brain time to think. Going slow engages the brain, giving it the time it needs to receive, analyze, and store all that sensory information. This helps build the brain’s sense of balance while refining movement. And when that happens, children are on the road to more deliberate control of their bodies… and yes, they might even slow down a bit!

So, how slow can you go? Here are 10 fun ideas I’ve used at home and in my classroom that kids might just slow down for...

Ready? Set. Slow!

1. THE GO-SLOW CHALLENGE! Little ones naturally want to please us and naturally want to show off what they can do, so when they’re dashing about at top speed, say to them, “Oh my goodness, you really can go fast! I bet you can’t go slow!”

2. CHANGE IT UP! Any time you change the way children move, they will automatically go slower. For instance, when transitioning from snack time to story time in my classroom I’d sometimes have the children walk backwards to the mat. Other ways include: walking sideways, walking on a line on the floor, walking with a bean bag on your head, etc.

3. TURTLE! TIGER! TREE! To give little ones a full sense of their own self-control, give them practice changing speed. For instance, when you call out “turtle” they need to walk very, very slow. When you call out “tiger” they need to speed up and move very, very fast. When you call out “tree” they need to stretch their “limbs” like a tree and freeze in place! At first, do this with a predictable rhythm. Once they’ve got the hang of it, change to a more random/unpredictable rhythm. And be sure to change the sequence so they have to listen carefully.

4. CAREFUL! CAREFUL! Set up activities that require them to be careful and precise in their movements. For instance, crawl through the tunnel without touching the sides or carry a ping pong ball on a spoon from one end of the yard to the other.

5. GIANT STEPS. The bigger the gait the slower the movement, so have the children walk across the room or play yard using giant steps. Once they have a feel for it, have them count how many steps it takes to get from start to finish. Now have them come back the other way and see if they can do it in even fewer steps!

6. TWO BY TWO. Pair up the children standing back to back, linking arms. Now challenge them to cross the room or play yard. Without even asking, they’ll automatically move more slowly as they negotiate their movements with each other.

7. THE SLOW ZOO is filled with the slowest animals you’ve ever seen! Have the children move like a turtle, snail, crab, sloth, elephant, rhinoceros, etc., or make up their own “slowimal” to show you just how slow they can go!

8. SLOW TALK. Doing anything slowly will help children understand how to pace themselves. Talking slow is a really fun way to develop auditory discrimination while sounding out words and at the same time giving them “slow” practice. Model slow talking for them and encourage them to repeat words or phrases you say. Then let them loose to slow chat with each other. It’s hilarious!

9. SLOW TALK & WALK. Once they’ve practiced Slow Talk, add a movement challenge for even more fun. For instance, take a trip back to the Slow Zoo. Have the children move like their favorite slow animal while describing their movements in Slow Talk. “I ammmm walllkkking lllikkke aaaaa turrrrrtlllle.”

10. IT’S SLOW TIME! Indoors or out, play any favorite game but take it slow. Great games for this are Follow the Leader or Simon Says, but try this idea with any game the children already know. Taking it slow will make the game different, challenging, (and often silly) for them!


WANT TO KNOW MORE?
If you're interested in learning more ways to help children develop balance and control, you might enjoy these posts...

DEVELOPING BALANCE: THE SPIN CYCLE
SMART STEPS: LET 'EM ROLL